Song “Blackstar” Exposes Nibiru, Planet X, Proves David Bowie Faked his Death


Bowie Predicts Nibiru And His Death…right I’ll believe that when me shit turns purple and tastes like Rainbow sherbert !

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Illuminati Grand Wizard David Bowie “Blackstar” predicted the coming of Nibiru before he faked his death. Laurel Canyon Lebenstard is racking in millions now in royalties #lulz


OK, we’ve all been properly proper about Planet 9: It’s serious science done by seriously brilliant astronomers (one of whom is fluent in Japanese and Russian!) and there’s no such thing as aliens … at least not anywhere near Earth. But, screw that. On with the fun stuff.

The astronomer who demoted Pluto from a planet to a lunch box believes orbital clustering of space bodies in the Kuiper Belt can really only be explained by a big planet orbiting way the hell out there, pulling and pushing these smaller kids around.

Call that deep-space body Planet 9 or even Planet X (if you still think Pluto is a planet, thus making this new one No. 10), but for God’s sake don’t call it Nibiru! … because that’s like playing loud music while trying to hide from zombies. The name alone will enliven the tinfoil-hat people and usher in a Trump/Palin presidency.

There have been a million stories about the theorized existence of this planet since Wednesday morning, even quite a few pointing out that it is just a theory and we should all wait until someone spots that damn thing before getting all excited. However, the dozens of news stories I skimmed didn’t mention Nibiru! Come on, man.

Here’s the theory of Nibiru in a nutshell: The wild man Zecharia Sitchin postulated the existence of a planet on an elliptical orbit beyond Neptune that streaks through the inner solar system once every 3,600 years or so (thanks, Wikipedia).

He called it Nibiru. Wikipedia again:

According to Sitchin, Nibiru (called “the twelfth planet” because, Sitchin claimed, the Sumerians’ gods-given conception of the Solar System counted all eight planets, plus Pluto, the Sun and the Moon) was the home of a technologically advanced human-like extraterrestrial race called the Anunnaki in Sumerian myth, who Sitchin states are called the Nephilim in Genesis. He wrote that they evolved after Nibiru entered the solar system and first arrived on Earth probably 450,000 years ago, looking for minerals, especially gold, which they found and mined in Africa. Sitchin states that these “gods” were the rank-and-file workers of the colonial expedition to Earth from planet Nibiru.

Sitchin sold millions of copies of his books. Then this other person said aliens told her a dark, secret planet called Nibiru was going to smash into Earth. But that’s just crazy.

Anyway, Brown and lead author of the Planet 9 study, Konstantin Batygin, say their planet is on an elliptical orbit that takes between 10,000 and 20,000 years to complete. They also postulate, according to the press release by Caltech, that …

Scientists have long believed that the early solar system began with four planetary cores that went on to grab all of the gas around them, forming the four gas planets—Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune. Over time, collisions and ejections shaped them and moved them out to their present locations. “But there is no reason that there could not have been five cores, rather than four,” says Brown. Planet Nine could represent that fifth core, and if it got too close to Jupiter or Saturn, it could have been ejected into its distant, eccentric orbit.

So, this Super Earth would have started out much much closer to the Goldilocks Zone than it is now … gleefully adding to the fun idea that a civilization grew up on it, seeded Earth with humans and then WHAMO! got kicked into deep space.

In short, if they actually find Planet 9 and don’t call it Nibiru, they’re just being stuffed shirts. (Neither of the authors responded to my Twitter requests for their opinion on this matter, BTW.)

And if they find it and NASA sends a deep probe to it, perhaps it will see the ruins of a once-thriving alien civilization. Perhaps Yoda will invite it in for some Tauntaun soup. I’m rooting for that.

After all, the alien civilizations we humans have been imagining all around us for millennia have been chased from the moon, to Mars and beyond as our space agencies go farther and farther out with more and more sophisticated equipment … and that just makes us feel lonely and crabby.

So bring on the aliens already!

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